We recently had a conversation with Beth Bowman, LPC-MHSP, CPCS, Clinical Supervisor of Partnership’s Victim Support Services Counseling Program. Beth supervises one licensed counselor and eight interns working on their master’s in clinical counseling. Together, they have 100-150 sessions each month with victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, at no charge to the client. Beth was kind to answer a number of our questions related to the work they do.
Q: When people have been traumatized, is there a right time to begin counseling?
A: When we begin, many are in a state of crisis. They have just survived a traumatic experience, which often results in another crisis, such as trying to find safety, both physically, emotionally and psychologically. Physical safety has to take place first. Once they have a safe place to live and their basic needs are addressed, we work with them to find and sustain emotional and psychological safety.
Q: How does counseling begin with victims?
A: Because of the trauma they’ve been through, we begin with grounding techniques, teaching them how to settle and regulate their emotions. Survivors tend to have symptoms of hyper vigilance, wondering “Am I safe?”, e.g., “Am I safe to go to the grocery store?” Alarms may go off, and sometimes a sense of panic and dread ensue. We provide grounding exercises that bring them to the present moment and help with centering and awareness. Trauma is remembered through the senses, and these exercises bring them to the “now.” We help them identify safe people and places to assist with moving out of survival mode. We provide validation for their experience and help them process their responses. The goal is to reduce the intensity of their normal response to a traumatic event.
Q: Is there often a reluctance to enter into counseling?
A: Oh, yes, absolutely. Today, we are conditioned to “handle things” and to be independent. For some, admitting they need counseling is an admission of weakness. Some only reach out when friends and family comment that they are edgy or distant. Fortunately, for survivors, there is no deadline for when someone can reach out for help.
Q: Typically, how long is someone in counseling after a traumatic event?
A: This is individualized as people have their own journey of healing. Some may find they get stuck. It’s very much like going to a gym and hitting a plateau. We can’t do the same exercise every day. We may need to change it up to strengthen other muscles. Like exercise, we sometimes experience soreness at first, but we don’t let that keep us from moving forward. Slower is often faster. The key is pacing, and, as counselors, we always lead from behind.
Q: What are some of the benefits of counseling for individuals who have been traumatized?
A: First, emotional validation. “This sounds so painful. I am sorry that you had to suffer through this.” Since trauma lands in the body and people often have physiological responses, they sometimes “freeze up.” Through counseling, they learn coping skills to manage responses to overwhelming feelings and bodily responses such as tensing up, numbness, “checking out” or the need to stay busy. They also have emotional responses to what they’ve experienced, which may show up as anger, fear, guilt, shame, or self-blame. Counseling helps support people in building skills in self-awareness, self-confidence, and self-expression.
They learn the meaning of self-care, which is more than taking a bubble bath. It includes several areas of focus, such as social – this can include surrounding themselves with people who celebrate them and offer encouragement, setting healthy boundaries, etc. It can mean attention to the physical needs, such as exercise, attention to good sleep, healthy eating habits; spiritual aspects – time in nature, meditation, time alone, belonging to a faith network. It can involve personal interests such as hobbies, things that bring enjoyment, serenity, and stability. Self-care also includes setting limits on one’s time, deeming oneself worthy of self-compassion.
People tend to redefine themselves after an event, so another benefit is a sense of empowerment as they learn to externalize the problem. “This is something that happened, it’s not who I am.” They start to rewrite the narrative. We get them to begin looking forward to the future without erasing the past – thus, restoring a sense of power and autonomy while envisioning hope.
Q: How do you evaluate success?
A: Collaborative goal setting allows clients to track measurable progress over time. As they see and experience a reduction in the symptoms that initially brought them into counseling (flashbacks, intense emotional responses such as panic, fear, guilt, shame) and get to a place where they can manage these, they will realize their own progress.
Q: If someone reading this has experienced sexual assault or domestic violence and is seeking counseling, what should they do?
A: We encourage them to call or text our 24/7 Hotline and let our team know they would like to be referred for counseling. It’s never too late to begin the healing process.
